Top 10 Signs That You Won't Do Well with UberEats

Driving With A Purpose

Well-Known Member
As a tribute to David Letterman's Top 10 Lists, I thought it would be fun to make a new one. Here are the Top 10 signs that you won't do well with UberEats...

10. Exclaiming out loud with enthusiasm: "Thank you sir- may I have another?" (Animal House movie reference) after getting a $3 delivery.
9. Constantly getting lost in the neighborhood you've lived in the past 10 years.
8. Your idea of wearing a mask is to put a bra on your car.
7. You despise the I.R.S. so much that your idea of success is to lose as much money as possible.
6. Since you're dyslexic, you confuses "thumbs up" and "thumbs down". As a result you piss off a LOT of people in order to chase success.
5. You're frequently heard saying in restaurants: "I don't mind waiting. I can just belch and fart while I wait."
4. You misunderstood the social distance guidelines and thought they said 60 feet instead of 6. As a result, you leave lots of food at the curb instead of doors.
3. When you pick up hot food, you frequently sit in the car doing notinng for a while so it can cool down. That way the customer won't burn their mouth.
2. You've been known to go back to a resuaurant and exclaim "This order is missing 3 french fries. Can you put them in a separate bag please?"
And the number 1 sign you won't do well with UE:
1. Your way to do pickups quickly in crowded restaurants is to tell those around you how many infectious diseases you've had in the past.

Of course, this is all said in jest and not meant to offend anyone, not even UE.

What other items should be on this Top 10 list? With all the brainpower on the site, I wouldn't be surprised if people come up with dozens more ideas...
 

tohunt4me

Well-Known Member
As a tribute to David Letterman's Top 10 Lists, I thought it would be fun to make a new one. Here are the Top 10 signs that you won't do well with UberEats...

10. Exclaiming out loud with enthusiasm: "Thank you sir- may I have another?" (Animal House movie reference) after getting a $3 delivery.
9. Constantly getting lost in the neighborhood you've lived in the past 10 years.
8. Your idea of wearing a mask is to put a bra on your car.
7. You despise the I.R.S. so much that your idea of success is to lose as much money as possible.
6. Since you're dyslexic, you confuses "thumbs up" and "thumbs down". As a result you piss off a LOT of people in order to chase success.
5. You're frequently heard saying in restaurants: "I don't mind waiting. I can just belch and fart while I wait."
4. You misunderstood the social distance guidelines and thought they said 60 feet instead of 6. As a result, you leave lots of food at the curb instead of doors.
3. When you pick up hot food, you frequently sit in the car doing notinng for a while so it can cool down. That way the customer won't burn their mouth.
2. You've been known to go back to a resuaurant and exclaim "This order is missing 3 french fries. Can you put them in a separate bag please?"
And the number 1 sign you won't do well with UE:
1. Your way to do pickups quickly in crowded restaurants is to tell those around you how many infectious diseases you've had in the past.

Of course, this is all said in jest and not meant to offend anyone, not even UE.

What other items should be on this Top 10 list? With all the brainpower on the site, I wouldn't be surprised if people come up with dozens more ideas...
Biff Henderson
And Larry Bud Melman
Approve of your Top Ten List.
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