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Need Help Lowering my Rating

1K views 7 replies 5 participants last post by  GGDaddy 
#1 ·
So I try to drive smoothly. I offer pax their choice of music styles on my SiriusXM radio. I'm a naturally friendly person.

So here's the problem. I've had a 4.95 rating. And I've actually let myself feel proud of that. So much so that I felt bad earlier this week when I pulled a 1-star for no reason, it took me down to a 4.94, and I took it personally.

Then I realized, WTF IS WRONG WITH ME? Who ****'ing cares if I have a 4.95, a 4.9, or a 4.7? Does my pay go up with ratings? Do I get more pings?

So I have a new strategy:
  • Keep being nice to people who deserve it
  • Earn a 1-star from jackholes who deserve instant karma
I drive 95 rides/week, so I figure if I "earn" a 1-star from one lucky passenger each week, I'll enjoy myself a lot more and will pull my overall average down to ~4.88 or so.

So some ideas I've thought of to "earn" my weekly 1-star:
  • "Now that we're in the car, you reek of marijuana. Not in my car. This trip's over."
  • "Now that I see your destination, I've changed my mind about this ride. The trip's over."
  • "Why do you think it is appropriate to talk to me this way? You misunderstand the nature of our relationship. This ride's over."
  • "The route you're requesting has traffic. I'm following Waze instead,"
  • (to someone who was late but I wanted the surge fare) -- "You're late. I can cancel and you'll be charged. Hmmm ride? Cancel? Ride? Cancel? (hold my thumb out and slowly up like a Roman Emperor) RIDE"

So what do you think fellow Uberers, any creative ideas on ways to "earn" a 1-star from this week's lucky candidate?
 
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#7 · (Edited)
Do I have any water? Day-yumm, Say-yumm, I was about to ask you for some.

Mints? Yeah, buddy, you need 'em allright. That breath smells like you need a root canal, too.

Yeah, I started the trip already. I should have started it sooner than I did considering how long you've kept me waiting. Now stop complaining about all of the pennies that it is costing you.

You're not tipping? [reach into customer's grocery bag, pull out apple] C-R-R-R-R-R-UNNNNNCH! Mmmmm, that'll do for a tip.

No, I'm not schlepping your bag until I see some green, LONG green.

[Show customer your Uberfone.] "Here, cheapskate entitled millenial, you can see it right here [point finger at rating screen] ONE STAR FOR YOUR MISERABLE BEHIND.
 
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