Delivered my first UberBaby tonight

Tedgey

Well-Known Member
Ha! Such suckers for clickbait. Amazing.

Except it wasn't EXACTLY clickbait either. I'm at home and I get pinged 8 minutes from my house, pool, 5.0 - I love it, what could go wrong? So I kind of leisurely get my cat inside and give her a little stroke on the back and my shirt is totally filthy and I stink so I change it clean up bottom line take my sweet ass time and start heading over. Also, there's half a tree branch in the front seat. I get there and I get my first glimpse of the passengers, a young couple and the missus is really pregs. So I turn the car around and pull up and start the trip and she's having a hard time getting in and he's helping and there's a real sense of urgency. Hubby tells me no no no no when I but he can't come up with the right word so I say hospital?"

"Yes!"

First of all, what a nightmare for these people. Not only do they have to use UberObGyn but dude shows up taking his dear sweet time. He's filthy and half naked. With a stick.

So here's what uber training doesn't cover. What hospital? And how fast are you supposed to drive to get there? And I don't know how women deliver, I'd assume it's in the conventional fashion but what exactly IS the conventional fashion anyway. One thing I know, I've delivered a bunch of horse babies (long story) and that is a messy birth. I decide my contribution is going to be getting these people to the hospital ASAP.

And so with husband and wife panting like crazy in the back I make a solid 90mph down 210 freeway go straight to arcadia methodist, hubby is on the phone with some doctor but if that doctor doesn't have arcadia methodist privileges, this couple would just have to get a new one. I pull into the emergency parking lot, stop at the curb and run inside to get some damn help and the admitting nurse is busy and wtf, and there's nobody but, wait, there's a guy and I chase him down and he says talk to the admitting nurse and she's busy and wtf and I turn around and Mr & Mrs pax have just walked inside and so I left. Didn't say goodbye, nuthin. Got in my now biohazardous vehicle and I uber on.
 

soulwarrior

Well-Known Member
Congratulations! I wonder if Uber would have granted you the throw up fee if she gave birth in the car?
That would have been a great story for future pax.

"Oh yeah, sure, right there where you are sitting is where the water broke and, oh wow, blood everywhere.....it was beautiful. Yeah yesterday. If I roll up the windows you can still smell it.....cool right?"
 

OCuber

Well-Known Member
Congrats Dr. Duck, you did everything right.
Took your time....giving pool pax time to catch the next bus.
Brought in the cat.
Stroked said cat.
Changed into clean clothes.
Did not end trip until pax were out of car.
Professional till the end.
 

Tedgey

Well-Known Member
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #9
Congrats Dr. Duck, you did everything right.
Took your time....giving pool pax time to catch the next bus.
Brought in the cat.
Stroked said cat.
Changed into clean clothes.
Did not end trip until pax were out of car.
Professional till the end.
No I still haven't ended it. Figure they'll have lots of other stuff to do and won't notice. I should rack some time while I can
 

durka101

Active Member
Oops, I guess we need to pick up one more passenger. It'll just be a minute or two extra...
could you imagine that passenger getting in and seeing that pregnant lady in the back. Huffin and puffin trying to keep everything together. Meanwhile there's a half naked cat hair covered driver in the front seat with a stick.

I believe that would be a great story to tell.
 

2MsBandT

Well-Known Member
Lol pregnant emergency and requested pool, I love it
That is how cheap pax are born. :biggrin:

He/she will hear the story over and over again about how he/she was almost born in an Uber, and how they prayed they would not have another rider join the ride because they chose pool.:biggrin::p:rolleyes:

And lil cheap pax will always ask, "what's pool again"?

And the cheap parent pax will sing, "Pool, Pool, is really cool. It saves you money so don't be a fool. Pool, Pool, is really cool, it saves you money, so always choose Pool".:biggrin::p:wink:

While lil cheap pax sings along.
 

Deric

Well-Known Member
Since when is Uber more reliable than Emergency services with blaring sirens, and hot routes. I see he found the time to choose Pool and enter the designated hospital and hope someone would accept it. Lord knows Pool pings are not highly sought, but anyways kind sir, good work on getting them to hospital.
 

soulwarrior

Well-Known Member
Uber Ambulance is born! First we pissed off the taxi people and now we will have paramedics and fire fighters keying our cars!
What's next? Uber firefighter? These 4 door truck drivers just found another way to get more pings! Just fill up the back with water and throw in a hose and your a firefighter!
Uber is changing the landscape of the world one occupation at a time and Tedgy is at the forefront of the new frontier........

I am getting a little teary eyed.......
 

driveflydrive

Well-Known Member
Since when is Uber more reliable than Emergency services with blaring sirens, and hot routes. I see he found the time to choose Pool and enter the designated hospital and hope someone would accept it. Lord knows Pool pings are not highly sought, but anyways kind sir, good work on getting them to hospital.
I don't think reliability came into it.

UberPool ride $12
911 Ambulance $1200
 
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